Technically this blog existed long before I started publishing under Rose P. Lethe, although its name was different. In my midtwenties I had aspirations of someday reviewing sex toys for a living.
I tried it, for a few months. My then-Wordpress was called Run on Batteries, which I took from one of Kaylee’s lines in Serenity.
It didn’t work out, obviously.
I have a lot of sex toys and paraphernalia. The picture above is only part of my collection. I also have impact toys, which hang on a coat rack on my wall, and a plastic tub of things that are too cumbersome, delicate, or awkwardly shaped to fit in a mesh over-the-door organizer.
It was the size of my collection and my desire to build on it that made me want to start blogging. A collection of anything isn’t as satisfying when you can’t share it or brag about it, and what better place than the internet?
I soon realized that, although I have a lot of sex toys, I don’t use a lot of sex toys. I don’t deviate much from my favorites. And worse than that, my favorites are everyone else’s favorites—the Magic Wand, the Wahl, Lelo’s Mona 2, the Njoy Pure Wand, and so on.
My collection is built largely on some silly hope that I’ll find a new favorite, something that’ll rock my clit and maybe finally make me squirt. A noble goal to build a review site on, sure, except that I don’t have the patience to support it.
I mean, it took me years to pick up my discarded Magic Wand and give it a second try—and then it was only out of frustration at feeling like the only person in the world who didn’t worship at the shrine of Hitachi.
I buy a new toy, I use it once, and if there’s not an immediate spark I put it aside and reach for one of my favorites. Maybe I’ll try the toy again eventually, if I saw any potential in it, but chances are that I won’t. I’m too fussy, too fickle, too stubborn—and in all the wrong ways.
So, Run on Batteries went away. I returned to erotica—my true love—actually submitted a few short pieces for publication, and changed the name of my WordPress to reflect my new smut pseudonym.
I told myself I’d still write about my sex toy collection, just with less pressure than if I were a true reviewer. And I have written some and intend to write more. I’m still stupidly proud of my Harry Potter characters as sex toys post even if I don’t have the readership to appreciate it.
I have things I’m interesting in writing about, many sex toy related but not all. I want to talk about how the much-beloved Womanizer didn’t work for me, a ranking of my tentacle dildos, and the company Bad Dragon. Hopefully I’ll eventually build this whole blog (now titled Rosy Appetites) up into something I’m stupidly proud of.
In the meantime, I admit I’m plodding a bit. Trying to figure out what I have to say, what I want to say, whether this is the best medium for it. With any luck, that will pass soon enough.
Starting now, I’m committing to posting every Monday and Friday, excluding possible holidays, vacations, or illnesses.
Run on Batteries might have languished and died for good reasons, but that doesn’t mean any blog I attempt will.